Here’s a list of the 10 most recent things people were googling when they found me:
1. how do I get free stardollars on stardoll without a gift code
Which sent them to this page, and probably inspired a bunch of kids to try signing in as spongebob. Mmwahahahaa
2. homebirth videos
Which sent them to a couple different posts from when I was first pregnant and putting a bunch of youtube birth videos on my blog, I don’t know why. I hope they found what they were looking for. I think they should probably go to youtube instead, but I like to think mine have a more interesting context.
3. scrap freebie beatrix potter
Ahhh, I know why this one is working, because the homeschool estore had a Beatrix potter ebook giveaway when I was learning about scrapbooking. Hmmm, a Beatrix potter scrapbooking page. I’m loving it, I think I’m going to google it now… be right back. Wow. I’m the 4th ranket site for those keywords. I didn’t find one, darnit. If you come across a Beatrix Potter scrapbooking freebie let me know please. I want it.
4. mom being rude to their kids
Which led them to the Nancy Grace page. I haven’t posted anything about moms being rude to their kids, but I do see it in public sometimes and it really bugs me. I sometimes want to jump in and defend the kids but I don’t dare. The most I’ll do is sneak them a little roll of the eyes or smile, whichever is appropriate and sends the message “Sorry your mom is nuts, she still loves you and the rest of us don’t think it’s OK to talk like that, so stop the cycle, please.” That’s a hard thing to say using nothing but your eyes. Last weekend at the KinderConcert at the Capitol Theater, the place was packed- crowded with families trying to get their kids in line to sample the musical Instruments. It’s always a disorganized jumbled up mess down there. They really should make like LINES to stand in one year. Anyhow- I overheard a mother saying “just shut up and stand still (she was whining to her kids) Man, every time we go somewhere you bug me bug me bug me the whole time, can’t you just f-ing chill out for a minute, Jesus.” And I don’t think she was really praying. The same evil, heartless, insensitive beach person had her 2 yr old on a leash and kept yanking him down onto his butt. When he wandered into the crowd for a minute, she pulled him backwards. That boy will be great at walking backwards really fast one day. And, her hair was greasy.
5. Kindergarten math half lesson printable
A lot of people are searching for Kindergarten math printables. Note to self: write a Suite101 article about where to find Kindergarten math printables online and link them all together. This search brought people to the wildly popular Math Math Math page. Seriously, that one page gets as many hits as the entire blog. OK, I’m exaggerating a lot.
—————-newsflash———I did write that article, and I made a resource list of websites that offer kindergarten math printables——————- my editor at Suite101 renamed it “managing free printable worksheets” thereby blowing my whole “kindergarten” thing out of the water and so I had to rewrite it and remove every reference to kindergarten, so I’m guesing it won’t be nearly as popular as that blog post. Buy- here’s the list of resources and here ’s the article; Managing Printable Worksheets: Use Your Computer to Find and Create Printable Lessons for Free —————————end of newsflash——————-
6. google.myspace.com
Funny- it sends them here. I hope they find their URL box at the top of their browser exactly what they’re looking for.
7. ani mason
I wonder what these people are looking for, because I am sure they’re not really looking for the animated distorted pictures I made of my nephew. This is like the 5th most popular thing people search for when they come here. I’m almost insulted. What on earth are they trying to find? If you got here via a search for ani mason, please enlighten me and let me know what you were expecting. Let’s see if I can help you find it. mmmmmkay.
8. stardollars
Ok another search that ended up here Why am I writing homeschool articles for Suite 101, I should be writing about Stardoll.
9. stardoll neopets
Or Neopets.
10. communication skills with children
Oh I really hope this searcher found what she was looking for, or at least enjoyed this story. I’ve been doing a bit of research, and I’ve got a bit of advice in case you come back: “just give up.” When men from Mars and women from Venus make babies, they’re really from the moon. And not Earth’s moon either, it’s like Jupiter’s 5th moon. Seriously. When they reach maturity they become naturalized into citizenship of their new planet. All you have to do is keep them alive, don’t let them watch too much TV (you’ll know it’s too much when they’re reciting the show’s dialogue) and never feed them after midnight.
